just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
