is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
