Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
