I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
