Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
