summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize