the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
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