I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
