in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
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