there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Randomize
