Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
