babies were throwing up all over the place
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize
