One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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