Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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