i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
