its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
