I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize