But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
