these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
