It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
