I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Randomize
