with your own penis?
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
