shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize