I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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