Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
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