Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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