Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
