No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
