he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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