Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
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