dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
