school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
