i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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