Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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