Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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