You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
