It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
