Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
