YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
