Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
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