This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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