omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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