He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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