Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Randomize