You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize