piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
