we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
