she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
