i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize