you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
