i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
