id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I just want to make out with him forever
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
