He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
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